40
years sounds like a long time. Most of my readers haven't even lived for 40
years, yet. I'm sure all of my readers can't believe that I have. (Cue: eye roll.)
So, not many days ago, I entered my 47th year of life. (Cue: gulp!) I share my birth
date with "National Talk Like a Pirate Day." I also teach middle schoolers, which
provides a great opportunity to combine the celebrations. It's like "National
Talk Like Mrs. Weaver Talking Like a Pirate Day." We eat Chips Ahoy cookies
& do pirate-y word games & such. It's the bomb.
Anyway.
My
point today...40 years. 40 is a recurring number in the Bible, but I've been
thinking a lot about the 40 years those crazy, Hebrew children wandered around
in the desert.
God
miraculously leads them out of slavery. They are miraculously led & fed.
Yet, they complain. They doubt. They don’t trust.
God
miraculously came into my life a little over 40 years ago, at a kids' crusade.
A somewhat creepy, but mesmerizing puppet explained to me how the big, Creator
of All could actually come live in my heart. Miraculously free me from my
slavery to sin. Save me from an eternity in a very scary place. I was in!
Who
says creepy puppets are all bad?
But,
since then? Um, well, as long as much of my extremely blessed & smooth
sailing life as been all that...I've been awesome! If I hit rough waters? Well,
even in the midst of God miraculously caring for me, providing for me, leading
me via His Word...I complain. I whine. I worry. I don't trust.
In essence,
I want to "go back" I want "to quit."
Frankly,
I'm exhausted. Not from the battles...but, from battling the wrong way.
Wait.
Maybe from “battling” at all. The wandering Hebrew kids didn’t have to battle
for manna…they just had to gather it. They didn’t battle for light to lead
their way…they just had to follow it.
Why
does trusting a good, loving, faithful Father of a God seem to be more
difficult and unappealing to us than going back to a life that didn’t have Him
at all? A spiritually fatherless life in slavery?
Well,
I’m done. I don’t need no stinkin’ puppet to tell me what I need to do. Especially a creepy one.
40
years is long enough. No more messin' in the desert. God has eliminated all the guess work...the "what if's"...the battling...all of it.
God
has been faithful. In times, both good and bad, He provides.
So, 40
years is long enough.
I’m
tired of not trusting God, then going around doing things my own, messed up
way. I’m not going back.
Let’s
grab our baskets and dig out some manna recipes. Who's with me?
