Monday, September 30, 2013

40 Years Should Do It

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40 years sounds like a long time. Most of my readers haven't even lived for 40 years, yet. I'm sure all of my readers can't believe that I have. (Cue: eye roll.)

So, not many days ago, I entered my 47th year of life. (Cue: gulp!) I share my birth date with "National Talk Like a Pirate Day." I also teach middle schoolers, which provides a great opportunity to combine the celebrations. It's like "National Talk Like Mrs. Weaver Talking Like a Pirate Day." We eat Chips Ahoy cookies & do pirate-y word games & such. It's the bomb.

Anyway. 

My point today...40 years. 40 is a recurring number in the Bible, but I've been thinking a lot about the 40 years those crazy, Hebrew children wandered around in the desert. 

God miraculously leads them out of slavery. They are miraculously led & fed. Yet, they complain. They doubt. They don’t trust.

God miraculously came into my life a little over 40 years ago, at a kids' crusade. A somewhat creepy, but mesmerizing puppet explained to me how the big, Creator of All could actually come live in my heart. Miraculously free me from my slavery to sin. Save me from an eternity in a very scary place. I was in! 

Who says creepy puppets are all bad?

But, since then? Um, well, as long as much of my extremely blessed & smooth sailing life as been all that...I've been awesome! If I hit rough waters? Well, even in the midst of God miraculously caring for me, providing for me, leading me via His Word...I complain. I whine. I worry. I don't trust. 

In essence, I want to "go back" I want "to quit." 

Frankly, I'm exhausted. Not from the battles...but, from battling the wrong way. 

Wait. Maybe from “battling” at all. The wandering Hebrew kids didn’t have to battle for manna…they just had to gather it. They didn’t battle for light to lead their way…they just had to follow it.

Why does trusting a good, loving, faithful Father of a God seem to be more difficult and unappealing to us than going back to a life that didn’t have Him at all? A spiritually fatherless life in slavery?

Well, I’m done. I don’t need no stinkin’ puppet to tell me what I need to do. Especially a creepy one.

40 years is long enough. No more messin' in the desert. God has eliminated all the guess work...the "what if's"...the battling...all of it. 

God has been faithful. In times, both good and bad, He provides.

So, 40 years is long enough.

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I’m tired of not trusting God, then going around doing things my own, messed up way. I’m not going back.

Let’s grab our baskets and dig out some manna recipes. Who's with me?