Wednesday, March 16, 2011

My Inner Marie Barone


I don't typically recommend TV shows or movies. Last time I recommended a movie I forgot I had viewed the cleaned-up, airplane version and spent some time explaining myself to a very shocked and disappointed friend...one who had rented the movie for a family movie night. Egg: on face.

There is a show I have seen from time to time that, when the content is completely appropriate, has made me laugh so hard I thought I would throw-up.

On said show, there is an overbearing mother of grown sons who just can't let go. She is always putting her nose where it doesn't belong and not only "s'mothering" her sons, but often offending her poor daughter-in-law as well. I really can't relate to a person like this at all...that's what makes it so funny. Yeah, right.

I like to think I'm a cool mom. I like to think I have raised my little birdies up to fly freely out of my nest and have a wonderful life without me in their faces 24/7. I also like to think that when my son marries his fantastic bride in May that I will always keep my nose where it should be and be the mother-in-law from Heaven.

But, there are times...

Okay, like the other day when I called my oldest son to see if he was eating. Not eating right. Not eating enough. Eating. Did I mention he is almost 22 and has lived on his own for a while? It's probably safe to say that he occasionally puts some form of nourishment in his face.

Or, incessantly calling my middle son at college just to make sure he "made it home okay." He's the one getting married, so I hope it's obvious to all that he is not six.

How about the "baby"...who would be 17 as of yesterday that I call most mornings after I leave the house for RMS 310...just to make sure he's up, almost ready for school and knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that I love him.

The TV mom I refer to also worries about one son's safety so much that she actually sabotages a job for him in government law enforcement. I think she even sends a pie to the FBI with a letter asking them not to hire the boy. One of my sons will be commissioned upon college graduation as an officer in the US Army, and I've already been flipping through pie recipes and thinking of ways to get him a desk job.

Wow. Letting go is harder than I thought it would be. Oh, sure, when they were eight, 10 and 12 - yelling at one another because someone breathed on someone else - I thought I would dance on the day I saw the back of the last one's head pulling out the driveway to live on his own. But, now...not so much.

For those of you in the same boat as me - I know you feel this. For those of you who have long been without a child living in the house - I know you remember and relate. For those of you who think "that day" will never come - you may remember my words and say, "The crazy cavelady actually knew some stuff!"

My boys will all be home next week for Spring Break. I am so excited to have all of my birds back in the nest for a little while. The first few days will be a blast with me hugging them a lot, their dad wrestling with them a lot and me happily doing their laundry. But, towards the end of the "break" I'll remember. I'll remember that God gives them to us to raise up and send out. My husband and I purposed to give this sad world three more people who could offer something good and help it - at least from their respective corners - be a little better place to be. It's a good thing to see your birds fly. It was the goal all along...it's just hard to see the goal when our eyes are clouded with goodbye tears.

Just about that time...when my inner Marie B. starts to kick in and get selfish...God helps me snap out of it and see the men I get to still have in my life...just not necessarily in my house. And if that doesn't snap me out of it...the 5th bag of dirty laundry - that someone "forgot" to bring in at the beginning of break now making it's way up to my back door at the end of break - typically does.

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